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Saturday, May 29, 2010

Week 4 Saturday Centus


Hear is my hand again at the Saturday Centus prompt from Jenny Matlock. I find it quite fun writing and reading others short stories.

WEEK 4 PROMPT
“May I help you, miss? You look puzzled.”

Mmmm… thank you, I’m just looking for my father. We came in together a moment ago, but he seems to have wandered off.”




I quickly glanced around the room to take in the scenery . Just as I expected... lovely in every way. Ivy grew up the cream colored, brick walls. White Christmas lights were weaved in it to give off a beautiful glow. The tables were dressed in white linens and very expensive china. Six antique chairs patiently waited around each table for the guest as they started to come through the door.

I stepped to the side as the laughing and excited crowd came through. I wish I could say I was feeling the same excitement. But my heart was broken, torn into many tiny pieces.

They had arrived and of course, there she was in the Vera Wang wedding dress that should have been mine!

I took a deep breath and was about to start toward the happy couple when ...

“May I help you, miss? You look puzzled.”

“Mmmm… thank you, I’m just looking for my father. We came in together a moment ago, but he seems to have wandered off.”

13 comments:

jeff campbell said...

A love lost...a dad missing...perhaps it will all get better from here...wonderful story...Peace and blessings

cj Schlottman said...

Even through the writer's pain, she paints a lovely visual for us readers, all the while breaking our hearts. I like your writing!

Viki said...

Oh, what a lovely descriptive post. I could just see her there with a broken heart. Great job!!

Terra said...

oh sad, nervous - well written I need more...

easternsparkle said...

Brilliantly written - hope you get a chance to share more!

jfb57 said...

Oh how sad! Beautiful!

People Who Know Me Would Say: said...

I was drawn in by the description of wedding festivities and then brought up short by the end. Delightful!

BECKY said...

I agree...wonderful descriptions! And wow...I don't just want to know more, I NEED to know more....Who? Why? Etc...!! Loved it!

Tgoette said...

Really great job! I felt as though I was transported to the reception by your words. A wonderfully sad and tragic story but so well-written!

Cheryl said...

I could feel her pain and her shame. Nicely done.

Jenny said...

Oh, I loved this story. Although I want to know what happens next.

I can feel her sadness...and confusion.

Really neat use of the prompt.

Caroljs said...

Its a really good story

Kat said...

Beautifully written, I can see the room and feel the heartbreak. Wonderful story! Kathy

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